Spider Mafia

I do believe spiders have a bounty on my head.  I was in my daughter's bedroom sorting a pile of assorted kid stuff.  The dirty clothes and clean mixed with shoes and a healthy spattering of random crap hid a large spider from detection.  Said spider made his presence known by falling out of a shoe and onto my hand.  My home is pretty soundproof.. but my husband came running down the hall in response to the red alert scream I let fly.  All I could do is sit there with a shoe in each hand screaming and praying the bitch didn't move.

Husband crushed the enemy and I flung shoe across room in frustration.  Spiders and thier destruction are a part of my marital agreement.  Boogers. Blood. Dinner.  Laundry.  Yes.  Bugs.  NO WAY.

It was Not Itsy Bitsy

I believe my blood pressure has returned to normal.  At least I think so.  I just went out onto my back deck about an hour ago... but then just ten minutes ago.. I flipped on the light switch... and about stepped face first into an enormous spider web.  Holy ....SHiiiiiiiTTTT!!! was all I could say as I jumped back into my house with visions of legs scrambling over my head.  AHHHHHHHH!!!

My fearless husband comes to the door as I duck out freaking.

Enter flaming grill lighter.

My hero.

Laughing his ass off at me.